no longer easy on the eyes. [rowan]

Charlie pushed open the door to the tavern, Mae resting on her shoulder as usual. The first thing she did was look around, as she did everywhere. She may have been searching for someone, but maybe she was just looking around to see who was around her. She didn't even know anymore.

She closed the door behind her as she walked in, a little disheartened that she didn't know anyone in the place. There were only a few clio around at all; the tavern was pretty dead tonight. She took a stool at the bar, ordering what had become her "usual," just a plain alcoholic drink.

"Sure thing, Charlie," the bartender said. She had become a regular. "Where's Lesley tonight?" he asked. Charlie shrugged, taking the drink in her hand as he set it down.

"I think he's visiting his parents," she said, taking a sip. She licked her lips, holding the glass in the air for a minute before setting it back down.

"That's nice," he replied, washing out a cup.

"Mhm," she said, looking blankly at the bar.

Where are you? Charlie thought. This question came into her mind so often...but she couldn't help it...

Rowan was starting to wonder why he wanted to return to Amelia so badly. Sure, the rift had been hell, but at least he didn't have any Overloridian responsibilities to deal with there. Now, after an almost two-month long absence, he was stuck cleaning up the mess it has caused, and had almost double the workload from before.

He realized the thing he had missed the most was Charlie. And unfortunately, he was having trouble contacting her. Part of it was the lack of free time, and also the fact that he wasn't sure how to contact her when she didn't even know he was back yet.

Whenever he had the chance he would go to her favorite places to see if she was there. No luck so far. But today he was going to the Tavern, and as he entered he dared to get his hopes up that she might be there.

He looked around and...she was there. Charlie was here. He hadn't seen her in months. He couldn't believe how beautiful she looked.

"Charlie..." was all he said.

Charlie hadn't bothered to turn around when she heard the door open, but Mae had.

Charlie, Mae mentally whispered, practically in unison with the man at the door. Immediately Charlie recognized the voice, and she slowly turned, in fear that it wasn't him. But it was. It was Rowan.

A few tears started to creep from her eyes and down her cheeks as she took it all in. He was here, he was back, he was alive. She finally stood up and ran to him, stopping so their bodies were only inches away from each other. She could feel the cold from the night linger on him, and she couldn't help but wonder if this was all real. She lifted her hand, touching his cheek.

"Rowan...where have you been?" she asked, feeling crazy for talking out loud to this man. She had asked so many questions without an answer, but now he was here...and why the fuck wasn't she hugging him?! She finally wrapped her arms around his neck, bringing him into a close embrace. She wanted to feel him again. She wanted to talk to him again. She wanted everything to be normal again.

"I missed you so much," she said softly.

"I've missed you too," Rowan replied quietly, wrapping his arms around Charlie and gently stroking her back. He closed his eyes for a moment to take everything in. This is what he had been waiting to do for months. To hold Charlie again.

He had so much to tell her but he wasn't sure if he'd be able to. He didn't want to. The past didn't matter, all that mattered was now. They were together now.

"I can't even begin to explain where I've been," he told her. The whole story would sound crazy. "But I'll tell you this: I would never willingly spend such a long time without seeing you."

Charlie sniffled a little and nodded into his shoulder, glad to be able to smell him again. She was in the middle of remembering her love for Rowan when BLAM. Lesley popped into her mind. And then he was gone. Charlie was NOT going to deal with that right now. She needed to enjoy Rowan for a little while before breaking it to him, and to herself. The man she loved disappeared, and within two months she was with another guy. What would Rowan think about this? What was going to happen?

No, Charlie thought to herself. I am not going to think about that right now. Rowan is back, and that's all I care about. After a minute of hugging him, she let go, linking her fingers with his.

"So...how are you? Are you okay? I have so many questions..."

"I'm fine," Rowan assure her, as they walked over to a table and sat down. They had a lot to catch up on. "I think things will return to normal now. I hope, at least. What about you? Are you okay?"

I have so many questions..."

"Ask me whatever you want."

Charlie sat down with him, glancing over at the bartender, who gave her a quizzical look. She just looked back to Rowan, wondering when she should break it to him that she was with someone else. Once Lesley had come back into her mind, he just wouldn't leave. She figured that she'd find out some more about Rowan first.

"Where have you been?"

"You'll probably think I'm crazy..." Rowan began, hoping that Charlie would believe him. He was pretty sure he wouldn't if he were her, but he didn't want to lie so he had no choice. "Well, something strange happened at the Ruins. A sort of...rift opened and, uh, transported me and some other clio to another world..."

Wow. That sounded ridiculous. Rowan hardly believed it himself and he had experienced it. "I know it sounds completely unbelievable, but you could ask Cray or Alecis...it happened to them too."

Don't worry, Rowan, she'll believe you, Nym assured him. She knows that if you really wanted to lie you'd come up with something WAY better than that.

Charlie nodded, listening to everything he said. Sure, it was hard to believe, but she trusted Rowan completely. Unfortunately, she felt that she had broken any trust he might have had for her by being with Lesley. What had she done?

Well you didn't know he'd come back, Mae said, trying to be reassuring.

That doesn't matter, Charlie replied, it's only been two months. What is wrong with me?

"So what happened? What kind of world was it like?"

Just keep him talking, she told herself. Hopefully he won't ask about you...

"It was pretty awful," Rowan explained. He was glad that Charlie wasn't looking at him like he was insane. "There were no Eilemaiden and the people there didn't have daemons, so it was very strange. But they were a lot more advanced in technology and stuff. They were able to do things you've never even dreamed of before."

Before Charlie could ask a follow up question, Rowan had a question of his own. "But what about you? Were you alright? I know you must have been worried..."

"Oh really?" Charlie said, actually interested...but then her hopes fell flat when Rowan did exactly what she'd hoped he wouldn't. He asked about her.

"Yeah, I was worried. I have been this whole time. I kept thinking about you. But uh, there is something that I need to confess," she said, looking down to her hands on the table. She was fidgeting a lot. She had grown up some since Rowan had disappeared, but she was still the same old nervous girl inside.

Not able to look Rowan in the eye, she continued to stare at the table, or anything but Rowan. "I...found...someone else," she said in a practical whisper. She was absolutely ashamed, and she couldn't even imagine what kind of reaction Rowan would have.

"I...found...someone else,"

Rowan was quiet for a long time. First, it took him several moments to comprehend what Charlie had said. Then he tried to think of what she meant by "found someone else," because she couldn't possibly mean that she was dating someone else. Because that meant she had cheated on him. And she wouldn't do that. He knew she would never do that.

But...what did she mean then?

"I...don't understand," he said finally.

"I..." she had no idea how to explain it. She didn't want to explain it. She just wanted to go back in time and never let Rowan go through that thing and leave for two months. She just wanted everything to be okay. But it definitely wasn't.

"You had been gone for about a month and I didn't know who to turn to. I was so lost, and he was there for me the entire time. I just..." she almost dared to look at Rowan, but she couldn't, "...I didn't think you were coming back, Rowan, I really didn't...I had lost all hope for your return...not that I didn't want it...I'm so glad you're back..." she was barely speaking in full sentences. She would be surprised if whatever she was saying was even comprehensible.

"I'm so sorry," she said finally. She meant that, but she wasn't sure that she would just give up hope on Lesley like that. She had no idea what she was going to do.

Rowan almost couldn't believe what he was hearing. He had thought him and Charlie were in love; but a month after he was gone she'd already moved on. Worse than that, she didn't have any reason to think he wasn't coming back.

"How could you...?" he asked her. It was painful to think about how she could just give up on him like that. "Why wouldn't you think I would come back? After only a month!?"

"I don't know, Rowan!" she said, looking straight down at her lap now. The table was too close. This was awful. Awful, awful, awful. He was right, completely right. Why did she think he wasn't coming back? Why was she so stupid?

"Look, Rowan, I love you. I really do. But when you just disappear...I didn't know what else to do but try and move on. It was for myself -- I was doing something for myself. I'm sorry that I gave up on you, I really am. But right now I...I don't know what to do."

"You don't need to know what to do, because I'm not giving you a choice," Rowan replied vehemently. Apparently everything he thought he and Charlie had together was wrong. He wanted to forgive her. He wanted to be with her. But he couldn't. "Go back to him. Stay with him, and be happy. Pretend you and I never happened."

He looked down. Very quietly, as if a part of him didn't want to say it, he whispered, "You know, I would have waited for you."

Charlie finally looked to Rowan, but it was too late. It was too late for everything. She wanted Rowan, she needed him...what was she going to do without him? It was bad enough before, but now that she knew they weren't together by choice...this sucked so. bad.

She was speechless. She didn't want to go back to Lesley because she loved Rowan. But she wanted to be with Lesley, too. He was wonderful in every way, but so was Rowan. Why was this happening? Fuck!

"Right," was the only thing she could say. She looked back down to her lap again, breathing in real heavily so she didn't sound like she was sniffling. "Well..." she wasn't sure how to react. Was she supposed to beg him? Was she supposed to just take it? She had no idea.

What had she gotten herself into?

Rowan continued to look down. He didn't want to see the expression on Charlie's face. He wasn't sure why he felt guilty for making her feel bad, when it was obviously justified. No matter what, he never wanted her to feel bad. But he still couldn't forgive her. He took a deep breath. "I know you didn't mean for this to happen," he said finally. "But it did. And...and I can't just act like it didn't..."

Rowan suddenly realized what breaking up with Charlie meant. It meant giving up one of the very few things in his life that actually made him happy. His eyes burned and he shut them tightly.

"Maybe you should go now."

"You're right," CHarlie said with a nod, though neither of them were looking at each other. She took a deep breath again, as more of a sigh-type-deal, and pushed her seat out behind her. She stood, setting her hands on the table and looking directly at him, whether he looked back or not.

"I do love you, Rowan," she said. "I hope tha tit's not the last time I can ever say that to you." She turned to leave, stopped for a second as if to say something, and continued going until she left the tavern.

The bartender looked at Rowan, a little confused on what the fuck had just happened.

Rowan sighed in a defeated sort of way as Charlie left. Why did he even bother anymore? What was the point? It's not like anything he did ever made him happy.

He noticed the bartender staring at him and narrowed his eyes. The bartender, not wanting to seem like he'd been eavesdropping (even thought he had been) quickly tried to make himself look busy and said, "So...you, uh, wanna order a drink?"

As a matter of fact, a drink was exactly what Rowan needed right now. "Yeah," he said monotonously. "Just give me the strongest drink you have. I don't want to remember the rest of tonight."

"You got it," the bartender replied with a shrug.

Nym laid down on the floor and mentally prepared for a miserable night. This sucks, she said solemnly.

END.